Though the song is called “Monster”, there are some artists who never mention a single monster. Because it’s Halloween, here is the definitive ranking of which artist on the track knows the most about monsters.
5. Bon Iver
After listening to the song for over 8 years, I have figured out that Justin Vernon of Bon Iver knows virtually nothing about monsters. His lyrics, on the intro and outro of the song, mention approximately 0 monsters. He spends the whole time talking about light and going home. I do not know why he was chosen for this song.
4. Rick Ross
Finally, we have someone who knows a little bit about monsters. Ross drops the first monster reference right off the bat with the word “monster” and then again calling himself a “no-good blood-sucker.” While he could be talking about a tick, which is just a small arachnid and not a monster, one could also make the argument that he is talking about a vampire. Because of that ambiguity, he is placed at number 4.
3. Nicki Minaj
After the seventh anniversary of MBDTF, Nicki spoke out to say that “Monster” almost didn’t make it on the album. She said that she had fought Kanye to keep it on, presumably because she wanted everyone to know how much she knew about monsters, mainly that many of them have “teeth and fangs.” She also mentions Chucky, a movie monster who is also a doll. She also mentions Willy Wonka for some reason, who is not a monster, just purple. In any case, her knowledge of monsters in this verse successfully cemented her as the Queen of Rap.
2. Kanye West
Kanye provides the hook to the song as well as his own verse, probably because he couldn’t fit all the monster references he wanted into just one. His opening monster reference is to the Devil, also known as the first monster. He also talks about pharaohs and a sarcophagus, the two ingredients in making a mummy, another classic monster. Yeezy also mentions “profit” throughout the song, making reference to capitalism, the worst monster of them all.
1. Jay Z
There’s no question on why Jay deserves the number one spot. The first line of his verse is just a list of all the monsters he knows. “Sasquatch, Godzilla, King Kong, Loch Ness Goblin, ghoul, a zombie with no conscience.” It is clear that he just wanted to show off his knowledge of monsters, and it worked. No one else even comes close to listing as many monsters on this song.