December 15, 2020 / 9:00 pm

Speculative Saturdays: Grammy Award Predictions

Written by Duncan Holzhall

‘Tis the season, without reason, for awards to be granted, and soapboxes to be ranted. Indeed they are here, it’s that time of year, for another Grammy fix, and here are my picks. Only the big four, I won’t write more, for reading is a chore, and I don’t wish to bore. Alas now it seems, in a year full of “Dreams,” that the Grammys are worthless, who could’ve guessed? Quit all your whining, and I’ll quit my rhyming, we’ll get down to brass tacks, and predict the winning tracks:


Record of the Year

Ethel Brixby


She has been an undeniable force to reckon with this year. Between palming you a $50 at Thanksgiving and being more understanding than your parents about COVID travel plans, Brixby has come through and defined the zeitgeist of the year. Combined with a relatively weak field against her, she is a shoe-in for the Record of the Year category.


Album of the Year

Cloddagh O’Meara


O’Meara was rather unknown before 2020, given that she lives in Tuscaloosa and you rarely get the chance to visit. However, she showed remarkable prowess in learning how to work the iPad and surprised the industry by dropping an automatic slideshow of the blurriest posed photos of the family. The shift from analogue to digital demonstrated how forward thinking O’Meara has been, and her work provides a blueprint for the business to come.


Song of the Year

Doreen Marian Falsworth


While she faces stiff competition from Ethel Brixby in this category, I believe that Falsworth displayed a more nuanced approach to her practice. Her snickerdoodle production showed massive improvements from her previous catalogue, and her line of questioning how often you go to church was one of the wittiest to be released this year. Not to mention that, between her travel agency closing down and her friend Beth from high school passing away, Doreen could use a big win this year.


Best New Artist

Ruth Springbaumer


Although my personal preference for this award would be Cloddagh O’Meara, The Academy will likely award Springbaumer with the accolade. She left your grandpa thirty years ago, but she’s made huge waves breaking into the mainstream this year. Even though the all-expenses-paid trip along the Seine was delayed among label disputes, her choice to independently front the project showed a dedication to her craft. Springbaumer has positioned herself in the favor of The Academy voters.