May 22, 2017 / 5:22 pm

Bad and Newsie: Your Weekly Migos Update (5/15-5/21)

This week in Migos history was messy and I’m only going to cover one part of it: Katy Perry trying to get right with our favorite boys and turn the trio into a quartet.

As mentioned on last week’s edition of “Bad and Newsie”, Katy Perry released a new single titled “Bon Apetit” that features all three members of Migos. The song is a subpar pop tune that is really carried by the rap verse, like most Katy Perry singles, with a video that had to turn Katy Perry into a literal meal to make anyone even halfway care which is pretty much as harmless as all other Top 40 songs. The issue arrises in the fact that Katy Perry now thinks she is the fourth member of the iconic rap trio… AND WE CANNOT LET THIS GO WITHOUT CRITICISM.

Saturday night Migos appeared as a guest during Katy Perry’s “Saturday Night Live” performance. I’m going to include the video here, so anyone who is blessed and has not seen it yet will have to suffer like the rest of us.

My reaction to this performance is very similar to Migos’ in the thumbnail: I’m not impressed. It’s all very Miley Cyrus circa “23”: the haircut, the horrible trendy dancing, and the unfortunate attempt to be down with hip hop culture.

Let’s start with the haircut. I think this is the haircut that every young celebrity gets when they decide that they want to try to fit in with hip hop culture in a questionable manner. We’ve seen it before with Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, and Halsey. All I’m saying is that it’s not a coincidence and I think that if we can all agree on one piece of legislation it is the national ban of this haircut.

I’m no Mikhail Baryshnikov, but I feel very comfortable saying that there have been few things more awkward this year than Katy Perry attempting to dance around while the trio rapped. Not only was it incredibly distracting, but the awful, offbeat slander of trendy dance moves was just plain sad. If someone could please text her and let her know that the dab has not been cool since 2015, I’d be really grateful.

And then we have the picture taken post performance that I’m including here:

Bad, Blond and Boujee. #KatyPerry #Migos #SNL 📷@hiphopdx

A post shared by Music Choice (@musicchoice) on

Katy, sis, no one else is posing like that… You look like a question mark or one of the kids from my high school who thought that they were going to be the next Jay-Z… Please take social hints from everyone else around you and just pose normal next time.

The most important thing about this performance is Quavo’s pink jacket. The beautiful, sequined flowers adorning the pale pink bomber were almost enough to make me forget about Katy Perry for a few seconds.

I feel as though I’ve said too much, so I’m going to wrap this up with a bow: Katy Perry will definitely be embarrassed in two years when she looks back at this performance and Quavo is a fashion icon.