Boys are burrito bowls. Some are better than others. In fact, some are great — the great ones come with spicy barbacoa meat, fresh rice, cheese, lettuce and hot salsa. And some are not so great. This variety has dry meat, soggy rice and...well, that's about it. (In normal people lingo, the burrito bowl ingredients sum up a guy's physical characteristics and basic personality traits. Some are cute, nice AND funny. Others are pretty, but have little substance. You get it.) So the point is every boy is a burrito bowl. They at least have that going for them.
But SOME boys come with a side of tortilla chips. Again, the chips can vary in quality. Some come with just a few, but hey, at least you're getting chips. And some come hot, fresh and with extra salt (in other words, they have could have a strong passion or be extremely good at what they do).
The next level up is a side of salsa. And the hotter the salsa, the better. So you could have the most incredible burrito bowl, a fresh bag of chips AND a side of hot salsa. This is an awesome guy. He meets the basic, shallow appearance requirements. He has a wonderful personality. Maybe he's a good cook. Perhaps he's pursuing an impressive career. Everyone's taste buds are different, so the actual human elements can vary slightly. But I think we can all agree this is a pretty tasty meal.
Now you might be thinking, what else could I need? Well, the next element of the meal is what you need if you're looking for something serious. When normal people talk about feelings and relationships, they may call it "chemistry" or a "deeper connection." I call it... guacamole.
The guac represents the feelings. That "click" you only have with certain people. It's the element that makes you open up to said person. It keeps your attention.
You can't commit to a meal if it's only average. You could get bored and think about pizza or McDonald's or Chinese. But the guac makes it pretty difficult to pass up. The guac makes you stay. It gives you security in your decision. It lets you know that you made a good choice.
And that's why before you commit to the meal, you have to make sure you're prepared to put down the guac. Make sure the person is worth it and they meet the basic criteria before you even think about spending extra money (i.e. time and effort) for the side of guacamole. It's a big step and you have to be ready.
For more in-depth food analogies, listen to "Bud, Budd n Buddy" every Wednesday at 8 p.m. on 99.1 FM.